What’s wrong with you? How could you be so stupid? No one actually likes you.
Ever hear these words in your own mind? Ever hear them so loudly that they drown out the voices on the outside—the ones trying to tell you otherwise? If so, you’re not alone and you’re not “weird” or “insane” or any of the other names that that same voice might call you. But you might be anxious or depressed.
“One thing you’ve got to really take into account, Rich, is the voices in people’s heads,” said Sandy Bevacqua, who is a board member of the CODEX for Anxiety and Depression initiative, researcher, lecturer, and health practice owner with a PhD in molecular and cellular biology. She’s spent decades studying the complex interactions between our bodies, the food and supplements we consume, and the lifestyles we live…all for the purposes of reaching better health.
If you know someone who is suffering from anxiety or depression, there might not be anything you can do to silence those voices. However, it’s still important to at least be aware that they exist; this can help you better understand that person’s experience and frame of mind, which will enable you to help them in small, subtle ways.
Tune in, and learn how to get involved in this project by visiting https://www.findinggeniusfoundation.org/.
Hello, this is Richard Jacobs, executive director of the Finding Genius Foundation, also host of the Finding Genius podcast . As usual, I want to give you updates about what I’m learning about depression and anxiety as part of this effort to create the codex which would be a resource of approximately 5000 sources and materials from scientific papers to lectures to books to interviews etc., all curated to look for and find every possible treatment for anxiety and depression.
So, I was having a conversation with one of my board members Dr. Sandy Bevacqua, I call her Dr. Sandy Bakhobak because it sounds more delicious. But Dr. Sandy, I just want to give you a little bit of her bio. She holds a PhD in molecular and cellular biology. She worked as a research scientist in both university and government settings and has lectured to the public as a medical professional since 1986, so a very long time.
She has a background in the fields of genetic engineering and human tumor biology. Dr. Sandy makes it her job to make the complex interactions between our bodies, the foods we eat, the supplements we take and the lifestyles we lead connect all those in our minds and help us reach better health. Dr. Sandy has her own practice for decades and she helps consult with people to improve their health and to fix their biochemistry and find the underlying reasons why they are anxious or depressed or overweight etc. A very smart lady, so in our recent conversation, we were talking about anxiety and depression. I told her about the new things that I am learning and she said, one thing you’ve got to really take into account Rich is the voices in people’s heads. Now, if you have voices in your head, it doesn’t mean that you are insane, it doesn’t mean that you are mentally ill.
But what I have noticed, literally through personal interactions with family members and other depressed and anxious people and what Dr. Sandy has seen by literally helping hundreds and hundreds and probably thousands of people is that an important component of depression and anxiety is that you hear voices in your head, not always but a substantial number of people do and the voice, unfortunately, typically is very negative, you are not smart enough, you are not good enough, they don’t like you, how could you be so stupid, what’s wrong with you, you are fat, you are ugly and on and on and on. I’ve heard from people that are depressed, when they are really depressed, these voices are loud, they are insistent and they literally shout out other voices from family, friends, husbands, wives, etc.
I’ve literally encountered this with my wife and my son. When they are really having a hard time and they are very depressed, whatever I say to them, they just don’t hear it and they keep repeating these negative phrases and I know that they are saying bad things to themselves. So, I don’t yet have a solution for this but thanks to Dr. Sandy, I’m a lot more aware of it now and it’s kind of funny that you think living with my wife and my son that occasionally have depression, thank God, it’s not all the time, I would be aware of this but that wasn’t until she told me. So, you, as a listener, if you are experiencing anxiety; so, I realized that although I may not have a solution to the voices in your head if you are anxious or depressed, it’s just a critically important thing to take note of. So, you, as the listener, if you are suffering, I’m sorry to hear it, from anxiety or depression or if you know someone, again, a co-worker, family member, someone you go to church with, someone you just see at the coffee shop every day, wherever it may be, aunt, uncle, whatever it is, child, husband.
Anyone you know that suffers from this, it would be very important for you to know that when they are in the depths of it, again when they are on by the newly formed scale, the 1 to 10 scale with 10 being you are at the bottom of a dark well or a hole, number one is you are up at the surface. If you are able to gauge or characterize for yourself or someone you know what number they are at, you’ll know how to talk to them, I believe. I’ll go into this in another podcast but has some strategies that I see are working well to help people that are suffering.
Again, this is not the full codex, I haven’t yet gone through these 5000 sources to figure these out but it’s just early on, early days, I want to tell you everything that I am seeing or experiencing. So, again, if it’s you or someone you know and they are having anxiety or depression, see if you can ask them how bad is it. How do you feel? Is it real bad?
Acknowledge it, I’m sorry to hear that you are really having a hard time today. I hear you and that can be very helpful to say that to people but also realize if you can’t get it out of them and they are just being unreasonable or if you are just being unreasonable or ornery and you just really can’t hear what people are saying or the person you are speaking to can’t seem to hear what you are saying or process it, know that there may be competing voices in their head that are crowding that stuff out.
So, another question that it brings to mind is are you saying bad things to yourself? Are you saying bad things about yourself? If the person says yes, again, you may not be able to really stop them, you can only say I’m sorry to hear that. I know that makes it really hard and that probably makes you feel really bad and I’m sorry to hear it.
I don’t think that way, just so you know. So, I hope this helps you. again, I want to take you on my journey to figuring out anxiety and depression, tell you everything I’m learning. So, I hope this helps. I’d like your feedback on whether you know somebody or again, you yourself have experienced these voices, if you are willing, tell me what the voices say, how strong are they or what have you heard from other people and any nuances or tips and tricks that you’ve found to help combat them or silence them or at least lower their volume.
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